Journal of Psychological Science and Research

There can be no mistake we are living a new sexual revolution, in which concepts such as sex, gender, gender identity, gender roles, sexual orientation, transsexuality, transgender, cissexuality, asexuality, among others, require conceptual clarity. The LGBTQ community is becoming increasingly well-known and, subsequently, it is often stigmatized, discriminated against, subject to violence, the target of sexism, racism, classism, ageism, etc., feed a deep- rooted and internalized prejudice. In this article I would like to approach the topic from a different perspective; that of the parents, as I feel there is also a degree of prejudice against them, which is rarely discussed.

General expectation is that LGBTQ mothers and fathers necessarily face additional sources of stress related to prejudice and discrimination, whether from the general population or from professionals in the social and educational network, among others.

However, truth is that parents struggle equally with their own internal prejudices and against their own expectations. A new baby is idealized right from the womb. We hope for a healthy baby, we hope to see the baby's sex in the ultrasound, we choose the baby's first clothes, the color of the bedroom, we search for the best kindergarten option, we plan part of the baby's life. Such is the normal and expected behavior in human life. Realizing the existence of non-heteronormativity (straight sexual orientation) or non-cisnormativity (identification with the sex assigned at birth), whether one likes it or not, comes as a shock. It is a disruptive life situation that cannot and should not be taken lightly. Immediate acceptance, although desirable, would not be healthy. Parents find themselves in a situation of loss, of losing their dreams, their projects, the son or daughter they have known forever, and who is turning into something different from what they cherished.

This loss must be lived, it must be cried over and yes, there must be a grieving process. Without it, acceptance is not possible. Sons or daughters and the social community in general must understand this sadness, because if they don't, they will also be prejudiced. It is wise to remember that revolutions do not solidify overnight, it takes time, space, clarity, education, empathy and understanding from all sides or, otherwise, it becomes a dictatorship.

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The Authors declare that there are no conflicts of interest.